Confessing…made fun and prosperous

What is confessing…
Once you tell someone what is in your mind, what has been surfacing in your thoughts..are you willing to be comfortable with what is to follow…Well that is what I have decided to do. Be comfortable with my “confessing”
I met an energy healer and she told me that she sensed that there is an energy blockage within me and in between our meeting discussions, her questions regarding my personal life kept coming up…what’s happening in love life….what about your marriage. Having learnt/practiced/witnessed…”every word I say is what is creating my future”…I told her I do like someone, but am unable to tell him. She slammed her palm on the table and said…there you go, that is what is blocking your prosperity, you are not ready to confess, so someone is not ready to confess to you that ‘He likes you’ (I understood it as ‘I am not being able to receive’). What a pickle….I was like “Can I just talk to his angles”…”Can I request his universe”  How can I go and tell him that I like him or more. Do I even know that to be true. I have no practice saying such things to anyone, never done it in past.

So not being able to receive has been my blockage, and I am ‘so’ willing to change ….”I am willing to receive with love”
Don’t know if my motivation was taking my vision, my passion, IADLife forward…but it did do the job…motivated me to work on my confession
That still is not my confession. Before, I could say anything further, the energy worker told me, why worry about the consequence. I realised that ….
1) people think/decide/dialogue from beforehand whatever is their worst fear before confessing, that could be one of the reasons confessing is always associated with as if one has done something wrong. What if we change that…decide on the dialogue that we desire or simply say something that will lead to prosperity to all involved. Universe being mighty and all, and it having all the highest form of permutations and combinations…I would like to give ‘it’ to decide the “how”
2) there is in this act of sharing our clear feelings that is act of receiving in some way….

So going by the thought “something wonderful is about to happen” and “Whatever will happen will be in best interest of all that are involved”
So here’s my confession to him “Ever since you came to me after my Mom’s funeral and said ‘I will come and talk to you’. My first thought was ‘Why!’…as I was not interested in another condolence conversation. When you sat on my work station table and told me all the places you have travelled/studied, I noticed that these were exactly the places I had travelled/studied possibly a decade ago. I did not know if that meant anything.

After meeting and interacting with you the the feelings that surfaced were so nice, that I did not recognise it. I had not felt these feelings since long and I was thoroughly confused. This confusion gave rise to anger. And you could have remembered my outbursts or my angry sms(s).

I was not clear. But, with the new year I have set my intention to be clear and honest. I do believe that these thoughts and actions are surfacing/happening because of this intention.

You were gone for a long time, but I still remembered you. And now you are back….so please do stay.

For a person like me ‘feelings’, are very important and I value them now. I had unknowingly supressed, ignored, and de-valued my feelings for a long time. I now understand the significance of the ‘feelings’ and  know the fact that they are the essence or reason for creation of all  of our thoughts.

And, I now know the answer to that ‘Why!’, You pulled me out of the situation I was going deep into, where I was working only out of fear and was not working for me, you brought me back and helped me give myself a chance to be me, you helped me feel, you gave me an avenue to be the same happy go lucky girl I used to be, you in some/many way(s) saved me, and I know that only today. So I am grateful for this act of kindness done inadvertently. I would like to say ‘Thank you’ and I would like to be in your life, lovingly. I would like to be your friend”
It’s wonderful to be able to clear my mind, speak my mind. This is an amazing start for me. Will keep it up.
Affirmation “I love my beautiful mind”

“I love my beautiful feelings”

 

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