When in doubt on reply, do not defend, AFFIRM
Case Study: “B”, a 35 years old Man met his neighbours who had moved to a new location about couple of years back. After the greetings, during the update, the neighbor just sprung the question “hey did you get married?”
It sounds like a straight forward, harmless question. But, what about “B”, what if he had gone through some tough situations and experiences while looking for the right bride? What if, he was heart broken after a break up? In either of these situations he could have been embarrassed or offended and could have given curt or self pity answers. “B”, however took this opportunity to create his new future that he desired, so he affirmed as he replied “Prospects are good, it will most definitely happen at the right divine time.”
When you are put on spot on a subject you feel sensitive about, the moment you feel that, please note that, this is the area of your life that needs your support the most. You support this portion of your life with your best affirmation till you can take an action or while you take an action. Say what you truly want and wish to believe about the area in your life.
Case Study : “L” 47 year old lady, moved to a new job and new place, against everyone’s wishes and advice. Just after a month, she was let go from the new job because of unexpected budget cuts. She was left with no choice but to start “new job search” to pay her bills. When her family asked her, “L” affirmed as a reply “Something very good will come out of this for all of us, this situation will bring amazing learning that will enhance our lives beyond my expectation, the right job is looking for me too and will find me soon.”
Impulsive replies seem like a quick fix for the damage that surfaces when a question is asked or an inquiry is made related to a difficult area in your life where you are seeking answers. These replies are defensive and reflect self blame or self criticism.
Sometimes you may encounter relentless interrogation and unsolicited advice. Use this situation to reaffirm and reaffirm. If you can’t think of anything, you could just say “you know what, can I get back to you on that!” If the question persists, affirm out loud as a reply or in your mind that “something very good will come out of this situation for me” and say whatever comes to your mind, for instance ” sounds like a good idea, maybe it will happen”, “I deserve good things.”
This is not a competition for who has the better say. Focus on your life’s area in question and talk or even choose not to. Consider this your practice arena. When you do talk, say the best you can about that area.
Thank you and Best Regards
Reena Yadav, IADLife