“Loving” is easiest yet most difficult practice of all the practices.
Just three simple easy to remember words, ‘I love myself’ or maybe four if you say it with your name ‘I love you (your_name).’
Still, there are times when you promise to yourself that you will love yourself when you fulfill a certain condition. But, what happens when you do not meet the condition. You don’t give yourself love then, what replaces that space.
Doubt, anger, irritation is expressed instead.
You act on impression of you formed by others behaviors, words, and gestures. That seems to increase or decrease the loving that you have for you. You use ‘loving yourself’ as an incentive, a reward that you give to yourself with every pleasing word or gesture from an external party.
Loving yourself when you are happy and satisfied by your own performance is easy, yet you hold back, deciding whether you want to give it to yourself. Wondering if you give it to yourself, then would it spoil you and affect your performance. You negotiate and bargain for something that is so doable. Many times you hold it like a ransom to what action you want to make yourself do. ‘You do this or else….’
Time and again when you have not reached your expectation, you have decided not to love yourself. But, hurt does not heal by enduring further hurt. Most of the time when you are hurt you look at others to be kind to you because you feel incapable of loving yourself.
Know this very clearly, if you are attracting love from others then, you do love yourself. If you are getting hurt by others, you really need to re-route your attention and hope, towards yourself. This may or may not take long but it is the only permanent way to get a steady flow of love.
You wear your best clothing when you meet others. You use your best crockeries and arrange for best dishes when your favorite guests visit. You are at your finest behavior when you are pleasing someone important. You work hard in studies or professionally to impress a superior.
You need to know that you are the most IMPORTANT person on this planet, in YOUR SPACE. Now picture you wearing, being and doing the best for yourself. Others enjoying you at your best is a bonus.
Addressing yourself in the mirror is a well-known practice for expressing ‘loving yourself’ suggested by Louise L Hay.
The practice itself is easy. Go in front of the mirror look into your eyes and talk. What replies you get initially, sometimes is difficult to handle. You might want to quit. Please carry on this practice. You could start by saying ‘hi!’ to yourself with a smile. As you start to connect with yourself and you could have short conversations and give yourself compliment or best wishes. Then eventually you start to trust yourself and have wonderful conversations and consultations. These practices can be done out loud or in your mind.
EFT/tapping while you say loving affirmations for self is yet another way, especially when you say wonderful words that do not convince you about you. Again you could start with few minutes and then let yourself decide how long you wish to do this.
When you recognise loving words or gestures from anyone other than you and that makes you feel good about you, you deserve to know that it is, in fact, the reflection of your love within you.
Then, for something that easy, something that simple, something that available, do you still need convincing!
To know what the benefits are, do the practice and see the results, for yourself.
Before any action ask yourself ‘what you are doing is it ‘loving’!’
“I love myself.” “I love ME.”
Reena Yadav, IADLife
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