Why can’t you give up ?- Wednesday Why?
People and experiences. Pain and joy. You have attracted them at the right time in your life for the right reason. Learning and change are the results. Some leave a more permanent mark than others. You are completely responsible for them. There could be mixed emotions admitting the whole responsibility. Accept to decide for yourself at a pace that is comfortable for you.
Avinash now a hair colorist came to the big city from a hill station right after he finished his high school. He had just lost his father, the only earning member of the family. He tagged along with some of his acquaintances while they were coming back to their jobs in the city after the break. Oblivious to the ways and language, he looked up to his friends with whom he was sharing the room to find a job. His first job was of an office boy. He had to clean three floors and keep them clean even while the customers and staff walked up and down the stairs. He fetch lunch for the office staff regardless of the distance of the restaurant and made and served them tea. All this he was doing for a meagre sum. The big part of his salary, he sent to his mother back home. In the evenings he used to sit in front of the office pavement and wonder about his future. In next few months, he moved to a new job in a restaurant. Similar situations but new skills and slightly higher salary. The next job he found was in a parlor taking care of arrangements before and after the service. Within three years of his arrival, he was training and doing the parlor service. Now it is four years and he is now a skilled hair colorist, earning a much better salary. He is yet to visit home but he is regularly taking care of his mother by sending money and making arrangements through his aunt for the necessary items. His present job provides him with further skill training.
Laxmi a married lady presently living as an Australian citizen. She lost both her parents while she was still studying. For some time after that, she was being sponsored by her sister. When the sister got married young Laxmi had to fend for herself. She moved into a small flat but was getting more and more worried about her future. She was losing all joy from her everyday living as she had to think of payments and future life growth. She kept looking for better jobs and kept her morale high by going to temples. She believed in the power of prayers. It was a day when out of sheer impulse she donated her last gold chain given to her by her mother, to the temple. Her own action left her numb as she had to decide what to do next. While coming back she met an Uncle who asked her to email her profile for marriage alliance. In that neutral mood, she typed the wrong email address and it reached a gentleman in Australia. The gentleman replied back saying that he was very much interested. Steps were taken and she had to spend a year in the US and then settled in Australia with her husband. The whole expense, guidance, and arrangement was sponsored by the then ‘would be husband.’
Both Avinash and Laxmi did not quit. Had Avinash left for home he would neither have experiences nor the growth that is benefitting him now. Had Laxmi given up, she would not have found her Man and future prosperity. People come in to provide support. Embracing the suggestion and help, and taking the follow-up step is up to you. Both Avinash and Laxmi took the action step.
What seems like a miracle is actually result from your action steps that you continuously have been taking. It gets visible when you are ready, willing, prepared or stop interfering.
Your life experiences are meant to build you up. They are there as a stepping stone and serve as the preparatory purpose for the next phase of your life. Give it your attention.
Let people be. Stop holding them responsible for your happiness. Channelize the questioning of your happiness towards yourself. Raise the power within by practice of focus within. When you shift the focus, energy, power, and responsibility of your happiness on others, it is then that you recuse yourself. Other people and external factors can only participate, co-create and contribute your life experience(s). You may or may not like the contributions and to the contributors, but be grateful to them.
You choose the next step. Choose the one that leads you to your happiness. Beyond that, the reactions or the counter actions are entirely your discretion. Quitting on behest of other or outside factors will not serve your purpose.
Caring about others is not a limiting. Just remember you need to care about your happiness too and first and more. Keep taking the next step.
Reena Yadav, IADLife
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