The difference between criticism and Feedback is the intention either to hurt or to lift up.
IADLife Blog: https://itsadeservinglife.wordpress.com/2017/11/30/criticism-and-feedback
Case Study: The online meeting was scheduled and the meeting agenda was around the queries the client had. By the time the discussion reached the third question, the client was already giving the unscheduled, unasked viewpoints on X’s functioning. X was pleased with the comments from the client. X too expressed gratitude for the feedback and mentioned how much work has gone in to get to this level, and how the client’s opinion was valued. Right after that X noticed that the client’s feedback was turning into suggestions. The suggestions started sounding like instructions and all the while the client insisted that it was sharing an idea. Then there was laugh included in the midst while the client recalled and pointed out X’s past standard of functioning. To X it was like being made fun of. By this time X was clear that it was no longer about which level to reach but rather had become about what was not up to the mark in the past. X started to feel the lowering in vibration. The excitement, value, and respect for the direction of the conversation were fast diminishing. The events were not fun. What started as FEEDBACK was now criticism.
Criticism is always unsolicited and unwarranted. Feedback is unsolicited and requested or asked but is always needed. You will always know when the feedback is not so anymore, by the way, your vibration sways. Misunderstanding due to misrepresentation of viewpoints or due to past definition and impression of the viewpoints can sometimes have feedback misconstrued as criticism.
Criticism is always received and given in low vibration. Feedback always is given and received in high vibration. There is nothing constructive about the criticism. Feedback has an inherent nature and characteristic to build and lift up.
Criticism is from a space that has emotions that reflect behavior that comes from or is due to being subdued. Criticism curbs your enthusiasm. There is hurt from past experiences and thus there is intent to hurt. Criticism is riddled with self-pity. All that gives rise to victim mentality for example past rejection(s), never been heard, not being given value, never being considered, never winning, or always being proven wrong can be the reason fuelling criticism. These may not be true but if you agree that it has happened to you then, that is all it takes.
Feedback is shared to improve, improvise or change. Feedback is motivating. Feedback is enhancing in nature. Feedback is all about respect and value in every bit. Feedback is given with an intention to raise the situation or experience and all involved. Feedback has the confidence that the observations, experiences, and suggestions shared is to make something or everything for everyone better. Feedback is with faith for a brighter future.
Accusations are always criticism and can never be considered a feedback. They have the intent of blame and the aim is to prove someone other than you ‘not right.’
Feedback is all about gratitude and intent is to have a better experience for self. Others gain in this process too.
There is a very little effort required to present your viewpoints as feedback. You just need to assess whether the points you are placing are boosting you.
When you are giving : Notice your vibration when you are giving your input. It has to be high. If it starts to dip, pause or stop reroute your sentences into that what will raise your vibration. You also have the option to apologise. Forgive yourself too for this.
When you are receiving: Notice your vibration when you are receiving the input. It has to be high. If what you are receiving is lowering your vibration, you can choose to stop the interaction if you can. If the interaction has to carry on then bring the focus to your self-love by self-love affirmation and/or ask help from angels to shield you and cut the cords from whom you are receiving criticism.
Self-love affirmation for this situation is, ‘I love and accept myself exactly as I am.’ Reason for this affirmation: although you have attracted these low vibration comments, you have decided to love and accept yourself in spite of this. And from now on you choose to attract loving ways of input in future and assure yourself that you will be paying attention.
Criticism shows you are stuck due to unresolved past issues. So choose to switch to feedback which is resolved and futuristic in nature.
Reena Yadav, IADLife
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